light bulb

all day, i think of profound things, humourous things, random things to post about. when i'm lying in bed at night, i'm writing witty commentary to my day. but during the small window of time that i have a computer in the evenings...i don't feel like writing. i'm tired. i'm hanging out with my husband. i'm vegging out on facebook or google reader. and my blog goes to pot.

something that i had never valued BB (before ben) was spending time alone. i was fine to spend time alone but i wasn't searching it out. now, it's what i look forward to on the weekends. i wait all week until saturday when tim gets up for bottle #2 and i go back to bed for some bonus sleep. sometimes i go and do errands alone (and i refrain from telling strangers, "by the way, the reason my stomach is fat is because i had a baby a couple months ago..." ha.) sometimes i get to spend some time on my own at winners or the library. and sometimes i talk about going to starbucks and reading but i haven't made it there yet... but what is most important to me on saturday, is that it's different than my weekdays.

so when saturday rolls around and tim wants to work in the yard or, for example, this past saturday he had to go to work for the morning, that means that saturday becomes exactly the same as every other day of the week for me. it's enough to make a girl crazy. and i'm sure tim thinks i am once in awhile.

when a pipe burst in our basement suite on saturday, it meant that when tim got home from said work, he worked in the suite. and even though im happy to have a husband who works around the house and takes care of things like small floods...on days like last saturday, i was just ticked off that i wasn't going out and getting the pedicure i had planned on.

and it occurred to me: grown-up moments are not coffee and parenting magazines. grown-up moments are taking responsibility and the new understanding that it's not all about me.